When I arrived in Hong Kong I was hungry to form new friendships.
I wanted to connect with as many people as possible.
I was lonely and desperately wanted to feel like I belonged.
In order to achieve this I’d go to as many events possible and participate in random activities. I wanted to seek out kindred spirits.
I’m proud and grateful that I’ve made a number of beautiful new friendships in a short period of time. These friendships have made my life in Hong Kong so much richer and deeper.
But I’ve realised that having friendships is different to belonging to a tribe.
What do I mean by ‘tribe?’
I define a tribe as a group of people who share similar values and interests.
When you’re a part of your ideal tribe you feel a great sense of kinship. You’re surrounded by people you can genuinely connect with and you can comfortably be yourself. A tribe is also a supportive space in which you can grow and thrive.
Last week, to my delight, I found my tribe here in Hong Kong.
To say I’m elated is an understatement. I joined a group of ladies who formed a spiritual business mastermind group.
As soon as I arrived I instantly felt at home. I could’ve been sitting in a coffee shop in Sydney or New York with these women. Location didn’t matter; our nationalities and age didn’t matter. We were all on the same page, shared similar interests and values and our objective was to support one another.
I know how important it is to find your own tribe and the benefits of surrounding yourself with like-minded people.
Below I’ve shared how you can attract like-minded people into your life and experience the great rewards.
When attracting like-minded people into your life it’s important to get crystal clear on whom exactly you want to spend time with.
Once you nut this out you need to go deeper.
WHY do you want to spend time with this type of person?
Not sure what I mean? I’ll share a personal example with you.
As mentioned earlier I arrived in Hong Kong and quickly made a lot of new friends with varying interests, which was great. But from the start I didn’t get clear on who I really wanted to hang out with and why.
I took time to set clear intentions of who I wanted to spend my time with.
I desired to be part of a group of women who were running their own business, who focused on self-development and spirituality and who were open and supportive.
My ‘why’ was to feel inspired and encouraged by this group and to feel supported as a solo-preneur.
The great news is, when I got clear, I found my tribe!
Take the time to think about what type of people you want to spend time with and why.
(NB I’m not saying you should ditch your existing friend group. My point is for you to seek out additional like-minded people who you can connect and share with).
If you’re having trouble working out who it is that you want to spend time with, consider your passions.
Are you passionate about sport, art, travel, music, literature?
What do you spend your spare time doing or day dreaming about?
Once you have narrowed down your interests then link specific activities to those parts of your life that light you up.
If you want to explore your creativity why not attend a ceramics class. If you’re a keen reader consider joining a local book club. If health and fitness is your jam, connect with a Cross Fit group.
Aligning your passion with specific activities will help for you to be surrounded by like-minded individuals and find your kindred crew.
This point deeply resonates with me.
When I first came to Hong Kong I didn’t really like myself a great deal.
I was still able to meet people and make friends but it wasn’t until I really did some deep self-development work that I was actually able to attract my spiritual mastermind group.
You need to feel good in your own skin. Once you do, your tribe will show up.
It’s so easy to judge others. We do it on a daily basis especially when we feel vulnerable.
But when you’re seeking out a new crowd of people you need to take off your ‘judgmental pants.’
So what if the girl in your art class has crazy pink hair and random face piercings. Does it really matter that the girl in your book group is in an open relationship?
Instead of judging someone look past the surface and see if you resonate with them as a person.
Stay open because you never know, this person could be a kindred spirit and the key to finding your ideal tribe.
It’s true, you have to be brave and put yourself out there when looking for your ideal tribe.
You can’t just sit on your butt and hope that all these awesome new people are going to waltz into your life.
You need to put your desires out into the world and be specific in who you want to attract. You could connect with people on social media, blog about the tribe you desire, attend different classes that are aligned to your passions.
You will be surprised, when you put yourself out there you will magnetise the right people into your world.
When you discover people who light you up, be bold and take action.
Tell them how much you enjoy spending time with them and you admire them. Don’t hold back in showing your respect, but don’t go overboard either. You don’t want to scare them away!
But do take action.
Ask if you could join their inner circle (if they have one). Or start your own inner circle of kindred spirits and invite them to connect. You could start a private Facebook Group, a Whatsapp group chat (very popular here) or a weekly face-to-face meet up.
Create a forum for you to genuinely and regularly connect with your new kindred spirits.
Action creates momentum. And the more regularly you connect with others the deeper your relationships will become and the more benefits you will enjoy.
Have you found your tribe yet? Share with us in the comments where you found them and anytips you have.
If you haven’t found your tribe why not let us know who you’re looking for? You never know, you may connect with someone just like you in the comments!
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